Storytime with Rachel F Hundred

It was only years of training that prevented Teal’c from jumping nervously when Daniel Jackson sneezed violently. The Jaffa looked over at the young archaeologist and found him hunting through his vest pockets for a handkerchief as they continued to walk through the stark landscape back to the Stargate with the rest of their team-mates.

‘Here.’ Jack O’Neill proffered the tissue absently and Teal’c observed quietly how the small act elicited a knowing smile from Samantha Carter walking beside him. They all knew the Colonel packed the tissues every mission just for Daniel – not that he’d ever admit it.

‘Thanks.’ Daniel took his glasses off to rub at his tearing eyes. ‘I think I need a different allergy treatment.’

‘Actually, Daniel,’ Sam said, ‘it might just be the unusual nature of the plants on this planet that’s causing the problem.’

Daniel nodded as he stuffed the tissue in a pocket. ‘You’re probably right. I’m just pleased we found out that my allergies aren’t the reason why the aliens here fell sick.’ He stumbled on the uneven ground and Teal’c reached out quickly to steady him. Daniel gave him a quick smile of thanks. ‘It’s a bit disconcerting to realise we could effectively do what happened when Europe discovered the Americas, and infect an entire population with some disease.’

Sam sighed. ‘Janet was saying that it’s a miracle that it hasn’t happened so far. She was saying that she thinks it’s because most of the human populations we meet were transplanted from Earth so…’

‘So they’re already carrying anti-bodies for most of the diseases?’ Daniel finished. He fell into step beside her. ‘That makes sense.’

‘Still,’ Sam continued, ‘we almost managed to destroy an entire alien civilisation because our UAV crashed into one of their plants.’

Teal’c kept quiet; it was, he considered, a sobering thought.

‘We couldn’t have known, Captain.’ Jack pointed out.

‘Yes, sir,’ Sam replied, ‘but we could have still wiped out a whole planet with one benign action.’

‘That’s the risk we take.’ Jack said pragmatically as he marched forward, seemingly intent on getting to the Stargate without any delay. Teal’c nodded in agreement.

‘Yes, sir.’ Sam sighed.

‘At least we fixed what we did here.’ Daniel said comfortingly. ‘I guess that’s all we can do in these situations is try to make right whatever we did wrong.’ He gestured behind him. ‘Your sound system is fantastic.’

‘It has cured all the aliens.’ Teal’c added.

Sam beamed at both of them.

Daniel suddenly frowned. ‘What if it breaks down?’

‘We’re going to keep coming out and checking on it,’ Sam assured him, ‘and we think eventually the eco-system will recover and they won’t need it.’

‘Maybe there’s another solution.’ Daniel mused.

Sam looked over at him questioningly.

‘Oh,’ Daniel waved a hand at her, ‘I was thinking Doctor Jefferson might want to come out and spend some time with the aliens as an anthropological study so she could watch the equipment and study the aliens.’

‘What’s to study?’ Jack asked brusquely.

‘Are they not a unique species, O’Neill?’ Teal’c asked. The aliens were weird, in his opinion. Mostly naked and covered in some kind of white paint; they communicated very differently to humans and Jaffa.

‘For all you know they could be the Furlings, Jack.’ Daniel added; his irritation at the military man’s dismissive attitude evident.

‘Weren’t you the one who said you’d had more interesting conversations with dogs?’ Jack noted.

‘That was before they demonstrated they understood what I was saying by bringing the UAV to us.’ Daniel objected.

‘They don’t look an advanced civilisation that could help us fight the Goa’uld, Daniel.’ Jack argued.

Daniel gestured wildly. ‘That’s just so typical of…’

‘Captain Carter, may I ask you a question?’ Teal’c spoke over the archaeologist without regret. He was beginning to think the underlying noise of the planet that had caused the two men to argue with each other furiously on their initial mission, was once again affecting his team-mates.

Sam turned to him surprised but nodded. ‘Of course, Teal’c.’

‘You spoke of talking to your plants,’ Teal’c noted, ‘I have not heard of this before.’ He was truly fascinated at the idea.

‘Well, many people believe that speaking with plants is beneficial and helps them grow.’ Sam explained. She shifted her shoulders, easing the weight of the pack that she carried.

‘I see.’ Teal’c frowned at her evident discomfort. It hadn’t been his intention to make her uncomfortable with his question.

‘What do you talk to them about?’ Daniel asked. His blue eyes gleamed with his natural curiosity.

Sam shrugged dismissively. ‘Oh, you know. This and that.’ Her eyes alighted on the Stargate with delight and she made a beeline for the DHD.

‘Yes, but what exactly?’ Daniel asked as he followed her.

‘Yeah, what Carter?’ Jack grinned at the annoyed look she shot him.

Teal’c suddenly understood why his female friend had wanted to avoid the conversation; it was a perfect teasing material, he realised in chagrin.

‘Just stuff, sir.’ Sam replied as she hit the symbols that would take them home.

‘Ah, stuff.’ Jack nodded sagely. ‘Always important.’

‘I was unaware you owned a plant, Captain Carter.’ Teal’c said, trying to drag the conversation back on track as the wormhole blossomed outward before settling back into a blue puddle in the centre of the Stargate. ‘I have not seen one in your home.’

‘Well,’ Sam headed for the event horizon as she sent the IDC, ‘my last plant died and I decided not to replace it.’ She admitted a little embarrassed. ‘I’m never at home to look after it.’

‘Perhaps it died because you weren’t there to talk to it.’ Daniel teased.

Jack snorted. ‘Sure, it missed the technobabble.’

Sam repressed a sigh and stepped into the wormhole. Her male team-mates followed her. An instant later, they all reappeared on the ramp in the SGC.

Hammond nodded to them as the wormhole blinked out behind them and the iris slid shut. ‘Successful mission, SG1?’

‘Yes, sir.’ Jack said cheerfully, removing his cap and gesturing with it. ‘Very successful.’

Hammond gave a small smile. ‘We’ll debrief in one hour.’ He disappeared back to the control room.

‘I’m heading for the shower.’ Sam muttered. She was already handing over her weapon to the waiting Airman and she headed off so swiftly, she left the rest of the team looking after her with surprise.

‘I believe we have upset Captain Carter.’ Teal’c observed as they made the three men made their way out of the gate room.

‘Nah.’ Jack shook his head. ‘She knows we were only teasing.’

‘Maybe Teal’c’s right, Jack.’ Daniel said. ‘She did look a little…’

‘Pissed?’ Jack suggested when Daniel struggled to find a word.

‘That.’ Daniel sighed. ‘You just had to make that technobabble crack, didn’t you?’

Jack whirled around to glare at him and brought them all to a halt. ‘Hey! I’m not the one who kept asking her what it was she talked about to her plants.’

‘Perhaps there is a way we can apologise to Captain Carter.’ Teal’c said, clasping his hands behind his back as he stepped in between the two humans and continued to walk down the corridor, forcing them to follow him.

‘What did you have in mind, Teal’c?’ Jack asked.

‘A gift.’ Teal’c suggested as they reached the elevator.

‘We could buy her a plant.’ Daniel said excitedly as he realised where Teal’c was going with his idea.

Teal’c bowed his head at the archaeologist. ‘Indeed.’

o-O-o

Daniel’s sneeze garnered the attention of an elderly couple stood next to him and a family a bit further down in the aisle at the plant nursery. He gave an apologetic smile as he concentrated on blowing his nose.

‘I guess that stuff Fraiser gave you didn’t work.’ Jack commented as his eyes widened at the price of the orchid in front of them.

‘She thinks that it’ll work…’ Daniel frowned realising he couldn’t say the words ‘on other planets’ without being overheard. He didn’t think anyone would notice except maybe to think he was crazy but still…

‘Abroad?’ suggested Jack sweetly.

‘Yeah, abroad.’ Daniel mumbled. He wrapped his arms around his chest and stared at the bright orangey-pink flower. ‘You know, I don’t think this is Sam’s style.’

‘You may have a point.’ Jack noted with a sigh thinking of the young blonde Captain. ‘Whose idea was this anyway?’

‘Teal’c’s.’ Daniel immediately responded.

‘Where is Teal’c?’ Jack asked impatiently.

‘I think we lost him in the fern section.’ Daniel sighed. For someone as large and as noticeable as Teal’c, the Jaffa had a way of disappearing into the woodwork at times.

‘Great.’ Jack pushed a hand through his greying hair and looked around as though Teal’c would appear anyway.

Daniel sneezed again. ‘I think I need a break from…’ his hand waved at the surrounding plants. ‘How about we head to the coffee shop next door?’ His blue eyes gleamed hopefully at Jack.

Jack’s expression brightened. ‘Sure.’ He started to pull Daniel along the gravel pathway.

‘Shouldn’t we get Teal’c?’ Daniel asked.

‘He’ll find us.’ Jack said confidently.

Daniel let Jack lead them into the shop and to a table where they both sat down. Within moments they had ordered coffee and pie. Jack leaned back in the uncomfortable wooden chair and stared at Daniel.

‘What?’ Daniel wondered from Jack’s intent look if he had dirt on his face.

‘I was just thinking about our…discussion back on…’ Jack waved his hand.

‘You mean our argument?’ Daniel clarified bluntly.

‘That.’ Jack agreed. Look,’ he leaned forward across the table, ‘I know we argued because of the sound thing, obviously, because like we said, there was something…’

‘Physically wrong with us.’ They completed in unison.

Jack gave a quick smile and picked up the sugar shaker restlessly. ‘So we’re OK, aren’t we?’ He gestured between them.

‘Sure.’ Daniel frowned. ‘Why? Do you think we’re not?’

‘No.’ Jack immediately denied. ‘No.’ He cleared his throat. ‘It was just…something Teal’c said.’

‘Teal’c?’ Daniel’s eyes widened.

‘I think he was just concerned we might have, may have, possibly, thought you know…’ Jack waved the sugar shaker at Daniel, ‘that the other person meant any of it. Some of it.’ His eyes avoided Daniel’s. ‘Maybe.’ He sat back again. ‘Anyway, obviously we’re OK and…’ he finally looked at Daniel, ‘and we’re OK. So.’

Daniel frowned. ‘Did you?’ He asked bluntly.

‘What?’ Jack looked at him blankly.

‘Mean any of it.’ Daniel said. ‘I mean you did say I was flaky.’

‘You called me ignorant and condescending.’ Jack shot back.

‘Because you called me flaky.’

‘Well, you are.’ Jack said defensively. ‘In a good way, and besides, I was under the influence of that sound thing.’ He gestured with the sugar shaker, realised he still had hold of it and set it down.

‘So was I.’ Daniel retorted.

They glared at each other over the table.

Jack rubbed his hands through his hair. ‘So. Not OK.’

Daniel sighed and crossed his arms. ‘Why is this so important to you?’

Jack’s eyebrows shot up. ‘Oh, I don’t know, Daniel, because we’re on the same team and we have to trust each other with our lives.’

‘I trust you.’ Daniel responded immediately.

‘But you don’t think I trust you?’ Jack said slowly. ‘Is that it? I mean, this is kinda the second time you’ve…suggested…well, that you…’

Daniel’s lips twitched as Jack’s obvious discomfort but he was a little apprehensive because he had a feeling he knew what Jack was trying to say.

‘…might have indicated that you don’t feel I exactly, maybe, appreciate,’ Jack winced, ‘what you…’ he gestured at Daniel, ‘do.’

‘The second time?’ Daniel checked, trying to avoid the meat of the topic.

‘You might have snapped that I didn’t show you any respect back when you were under the influence of the…uh…sarcophagus.’ Jack glanced around to see if anyone was listening. The only other occupants of the café were sat on the opposite side. They were a young couple and seemed engrossed in each other.

‘Oh.’ Daniel blinked. He shifted position on the wooden chair.

‘It’s just,’ Jack began again, ‘you know they say there’s no smoke without fire and…’ his voice trailed away and he stared at the table before raising his eyes back to the archaeologist.

Daniel sighed again. ‘You did call me flaky, Jack.’ He pointed out a second time.

‘And I already said I was under the influence of the sound thing.’ Jack insisted.

‘No smoke without fire.’ Daniel repeated, pushing his glasses up his nose.

Jack scowled at him. ‘You’re changing the subject.’

‘No, I’m not.’ Daniel argued.

‘Yes, you are.’ Jack shot back.

‘No, I’m not.’ Daniel insisted.

‘Yes.’ Jack rejoined again. ‘You are.’

‘No, I’m…’ Daniel threw up his hands, ‘this! This is what I’m talking about!’

‘What?’ Jack asked surprised.

‘This!’ Daniel gestured at the military man furiously.

Jack stared at him blankly.

Daniel sighed. He waited until the waitress had deposited the coffees and pie before he continued. ‘I’m not changing the subject.’ He insisted as he took a deep gulp of the hot liquid.

Jack forked up some pie and shoved it in his mouth to prevent himself from arguing again.

‘It’s not that I think you don’t respect me,’ Daniel looked down at the table, ‘it’s that, I maybe, sometimes, feel like you don’t respect what I do.’

Jack lowered his fork. ‘I respect what you do.’ He held up his hand. ‘I do.’ His guarded brown eyes met Daniel’s. ‘I don’t understand what you do a lot of the time.’

Daniel raised his eyebrows knowingly.

‘OK, some of the time,’ Jack corrected, ‘but I know,’ he gestured at the archaeologist, ‘that what you do is part of the reason why we’re still alive.’

Daniel stared at him.

‘Look, Daniel,’ Jack said, an edge of exasperation creeping into his voice, ‘I admit that I’m not exactly enthralled by massive texts on Egyptian mythology or Babylonian history like you are, and I struggle to understand what is so fascinating about a cracked pot that’s been in the ground for a hundred years but I get that you see things in that stuff that helps us.’ He forked up more pie. ‘That’s all that’s important to me.’

‘I think that’s the problem.’ Daniel admitted with a sigh.

‘Excuse me?’ Jack glowered at him.

Daniel waved his coffee mug at Jack. ‘You’re only interested in the answer and not how we get there.’ He pointed out. ‘I can’t remember how many times you’ve cut me or Sam off half way through an explanation.’

‘Because if I waited until you finished the explanation we’d be dead.’ Jack pointed out with exaggerated patience.

‘OK, but has it ever occurred to you how that makes Sam and me feel?’ Daniel asked passionately. ‘It makes us feel like you don’t actually care.’

‘I don’t,’ Jack began.

‘See!’ Daniel exclaimed.

‘About the explanation.’ Jack finished. ‘I care that you came up with something that saves our butts!’ He gestured at the younger man. ‘Just because I’m not interested in how you’ve come up with something doesn’t mean that I don’t think that what you do isn’t important.’

‘You haven’t exactly hidden the fact that you don’t like scientists, Jack,’ Daniel gestured at him with the mug again, slopping coffee over the table.

‘I like you and Carter.’ Jack muttered.

Daniel mopped up the split coffee with a napkin to avoid answering and Jack watched him for a long moment.

The Colonel sighed. ‘Daniel, we just come at things differently. That’s all.’

‘We come at everything differently.’ Daniel noted, wrapping his hands around his mug.

‘You say that like it’s a bad thing.’ Jack pointed his fork at him.

‘Isn’t it?’ Daniel wondered out loud. ‘I mean, if we don’t agree on anything, how are we supposed to be friends?’

Jack pushed his empty plate to the side and picked up the coffee he had ordered. ‘We agree on the important stuff.’ He offered.

Daniel looked at him quizzically.

‘Finding Sha’re and Skaara. Defeating the Goa’uld.’ Jack waved his mug at him. ‘That the damn orchid is completely wrong for Sam.’

Daniel gave a small huff of laughter.

The two of them smiled at each other tentatively before Jack jerked his gaze to the mug.

‘Look, I guess we’re always going to drive each other a little nuts but I’m sorry for what I said before.’ Jack mumbled.

‘Me too.’ Daniel replied quickly.

Jack nodded. ‘So, we’re OK?’

‘We’re OK.’ Daniel agreed. He considered Jack for a moment. ‘So…’

‘So, we should probably go find Teal’c, right?’ Jack asked briskly.

‘Right.’

They paid for their coffees and left the snug warmth of the shop for the open air of the nursery. They found Teal’c, wrapped in a long overcoat and with a Panama hat pulled down over his Goa’uld brand, in front of a long section of small potted plants.

‘I believe I have found the perfect plant for Captain Carter.’ Teal’c announced as they approached. He lifted a small pot with a plant sporting purple coloured flowers and green leaves. He displayed it to his human team-mates.

Jack and Daniel looked at each other and looked back at Teal’c. ‘Perfect.’ They said in unison.

The Colonel reached out to take the plant. ‘I’ll go pay for this. Why don’t you guys wait in the truck?’

Teal’c acquiesced with a slight inclination of his head and Daniel nodded. He fell into step beside the Jaffa as they walked back out to the car park.

‘So,’ Daniel began, ‘what did you do to Jack?’

‘I did nothing.’ Teal’c denied.

Daniel sent the Jaffa a disbelievingly glance.

‘You were brooding.’ Teal’c noted. ‘I simply informed O’Neill of this fact.’

‘Thanks, Teal’c.’ Daniel said dryly.

‘I assume O’Neill spoke with you.’ Teal’c stated firmly as they reached the truck.

Daniel’s head snapped back around to his team-mate. ‘You disappeared on purpose?’

Teal’c ignored the accusation and simply stared at Daniel.

‘Yes,’ Daniel admitted, ‘Jack and I had a coffee and talked it through. Well,’ he smiled, ‘talked it through as much as Jack talks anything through.’

‘On Chulak, it would have been required for you to resolve your differences through the ritual of Kel chak mor.’ Teal’c noted.

‘Kel chak mor?’ Daniel queried, his curiosity stirring.

‘I believe it is similar to your sport of wrestling.’ Teal’c clasped his hands behind his back.

‘I think I’ll stick with talking.’ Daniel muttered.

‘A wise choice.’ Teal’c looked over at Daniel smugly.

‘You were kidding me?’ Daniel’s voice rose in indignation.

‘Indeed.’ Teal’c confirmed. He waited a heart-beat. ‘Kel chak mor involves combat with many knives.’

o-O-o

‘I’m not sure this is a good idea.’ Daniel whispered.

‘Daniel, she’s gone for the day.’ Jack said in his normal voice. ‘We’re just going to leave the plant in her lab. It’ll be a surprise for her when she gets in tomorrow.’

‘I don’t think she’s going to be happy that we’ve been in her lab.’ Daniel said stubbornly.

‘I agree with Daniel Jackson.’ Teal’c said. His dark eyes were shadowed with concerned as they stepped into Sam’s lab.

‘It’ll be fine.’ Jack said. ‘You guys worry too much.’ He placed the plant carefully on the central workbench and stepped back. ‘What do you think?’

‘I think we shouldn’t be in here.’ Daniel said.

Jack glared at him. ‘Do you think she’ll notice it there?’

‘I believe so, O’Neill.’ Teal’c confirmed.

‘Good.’ Jack grinned at them. ‘We should…’

‘What are you all doing in my lab?’

The three men whirled around to face their female team-mate, effectively hiding the small plant. Sam looked back at them suspiciously. Jack looked at Daniel and Daniel shook his head. The Colonel sent a pleading look toward Teal’c who ignored him.

Jack cleared his throat. ‘Carter. What are you doing back on base?’

Sam’s blue eyes narrowed on him. ‘One of the scientists called me to look over some results from an experiment we’re running on the gate, sir.’

‘And how’s that going?’ Jack asked amenably, shoving his hands in the pockets of his jeans.

Surprise flitted across Sam’s face. ‘Good, sir.’ She gestured at her team-mates. ‘You still haven’t explained why you’re in my lab.’ She held Jack’s eyes for a brief second. ‘Sir.’ She added politely.

‘Right.’ Jack looked around as though noticing his location for the first time before he looked back at her sheepishly. ‘Well, the thing is Carter, it was all Teal’c’s idea.’

The Jaffa turned slowly around to glower at Jack.

The Colonel hastily stepped aside to reveal the plant. ‘He thought you might like,’ Jack gestured at the pot, ‘this.’

Sam’s face lit up with a brilliant smile. ‘You bought me a plant?’

‘It’s to make up for teasing you earlier.’ Daniel confirmed as he moved to the side so she could take a better look at their gift.

‘This is great.’ Sam said, reaching out to gently touch the fragile petals. She hugged Teal’c. ‘Thank you.’ Daniel stepped forward eagerly to accept his hug. Sam stopped in front of Jack a little hesitantly. He smiled and shrugged as he opened his arms to accept a brief hug from her.

‘I can’t believe you guys went out and bought me a plant.’ Sam shook her head as she turned back to her gift.

‘We thought you could keep it here.’ Jack said, waving at it. ‘Seeing as you said you never got a chance to keep plants at home anymore as you’re always here.’ He grinned at her. ‘And you can technobabble to it all you want.’

Sam blushed but she held his gaze firmly. ‘Thank you, sir.’

‘Well, my work here is done. I’ll leave you to it.’ Jack said. He gave another smile and headed for the door.

”Night, sir.’ Sam called out.

‘I too must leave.’ Teal’c said, excusing himself. He bowed to Sam and headed out.

Daniel leaned on the workbench as Sam reached for the plant. ‘Sorry about barging into your lab.’ He said. ‘Jack wanted to surprise you.’

Sam gave him a quick smile of reassurance. ‘It’s fine.’

‘So what’s this experiment on the gate?’ Daniel asked.

‘We’re just doing some radiation checks.’ Her eyes suddenly narrowed on him. ‘You seem a bit brighter.’

‘Jack and I talked about our…uh…’ Daniel waved vaguely.

‘Your argument.’ Sam bit her lip to stop from smiling. ‘How did it go?’

‘Good.’ Daniel admitted. ‘Good.’

Sam nodded and placed the plant carefully on top one of the cabinets as they headed out of the lab together. ‘That’s good to hear,’ she commented. ‘I think Teal’c had plans to make you undergo some kind of Jaffa bonding thing if you hadn’t sorted it out.’

Daniel’s eyes widened. ‘Some kind of Jaffa bonding thing?’

Sam led the way out of her lab. ‘Sure. Kel chak mor, I think?’

‘I don’t suppose he told you what it involved?’ Daniel asked hopefully.

‘I think he said it involved some kind of wrestling.’ Sam noted as they stepped into the elevator.

‘Ah.’ Daniel smiled. He knew it. Teal’c had just been kidding him and…

‘With knives.’ Sam added.

Daniel’s eyes widened and his gaze shot to Sam’s. He saw her smiling smugly back at him. ‘You and Teal’c cooked this up to get back at me for teasing you on the planet, haven’t you?’ He complained huffily as he crossed his arms across his chest.

Sam patted his arm comfortingly, not denying the accusation. ‘Teal’c felt guilty that you and the Colonel ended up teasing me just because he asked me a question to stop you two arguing.’ She grinned. ‘You should see what he has in mind for Colonel O’Neill.’

o-O-o

Jack frowned across the gym mat at Teal’c. He wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting when Teal’c had offered to show him the Jaffa sport of Kel chak mor, he mused, but it wasn’t this. He cleared his throat nervously and waved at his friend.

‘Are you sure the knives are really necessary, Teal’c?’

fin.